Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Pregnancy Expectations

I keep having these thoughts and feelings of, "The baby will come at ANY time from now on." and part of it is the overwhelming peace and calm, and another part of it is, "Ok, let's get these things done!!"  Since I've read a myriad of pregnancy and labor related books, my expectation is that I really do not have any preconceived expectations.  I don't expect the baby to come on his "due date" and know it could be before or after, or on the due date, really any time.  God has numbered the hairs on my head and He has providentially ordained when my baby will born into this world, so I am not holding onto some arbitrary date, I see it more as a motivation to have things ready and in order weeks before that date.  There is such peace because I trust in the Lord and His will, not only for my salvation, my every day life, but also in labor and birth.  Maybe I'll take 2 days of laboring, maybe a few hours, either way, I will draw on His strength and the support of those who He has surrounded me with.

But what about the "nesting"?  Maybe that is what it is, I've had people ask, "So have you gone into nesting mode yet?" and I've said no, because I didn't feel like I had.  But this last week and a half I've felt this urgency to have some simple things prepared.  Part of the craziness is waiting until the baby shower to see what things people are kind enough to gift us with, and then make a list of essentials I want in the home before the birth.  Part of me thinks, "What if everyone gives me a bunch of cute stuff that I can do without?!" then we have a lot of money to spend before the baby arrives!  But if I can trust the Lord with labor and birth, then I most certainly can trust Him to provide the essentials, especially since I know the Lord uses means, and one of those means is a hard working husband who loves his unborn child so fully!

One of the non-baby related preparations I want to finish by next week is freezer meals/snacks.  It's quite popular on pinterest and the food bloggers to do "40 meals in 4 hours!", but I've found that isn't very feasible for our budget, especially because I do not buy cheap meat and cheap food-like products.  In fact, it's kind of annoying how 95% of freezer meals out there are so meaty.  We consume about a fraction of the amount of the meat the average American family eats.  And when we do, I try and find the higher quality hormone free, grass fed, free range, etc. types.  So even if I wanted to do 40 meals in one Saturday and have it all done with, the meat would be far too expensive, aside from the fact that I don't want to eat meat for every meal.  Mixing it in with something is more feasible.  Thus, I've just been trying out a few new meals that are freezer friendly, or making some normal meals we eat that are freezer friendly, and doubling or tripling it so we can eat it for dinner, then I can freeze the rest for later.  No extra work on my part, since I'm cooking dinner every night anyway, and I'm slowly stocking my freezer.  Note, slowly.  Which I'm ready to have it full, but this method works for me and our budget, so I'm just learning to be patient.  But then that thought, "What if the baby were born NEXT week and I only have a weeks worth of freezer meals?!?!"  Well then, we'll only have one week of convenience, I suppose.

Our home is not really baby-ready yet, due to waiting on the shower.  But that's ok. Come next Monday, I know that will change significantly, and come Saturday night, I'll probably have a working list for Samuel of what items I think we need, and then discuss what he thinks we need. (:  It's all so surreal to think about because our little man is almost here.  The exciting new season of parenthood, diapers, feeding, and learning about a little person is so close, and as excited as I am now, I cannot comprehend what joy and excitement Samuel and I will have when it actually is here!

In summary, I've talked to many different people, read many different blogs, books, and advice, that the truth is, my expectations are that I don't really have set expectations.  I'm ready to be flexible and just experience it all as it comes.  God has been so incredibly gracious toward me throughout this whole pregnancy, that I count it all undeserved blessings.  I have not been horrible sick, I have not been hindered from doing my normal routines, and He has surrounded me with so much love and support that I cannot help but be overwhelmed.  This pregnancy has been one of great learning in many ways, both intensely personal, and in general, and I wouldn't trade one moment of it for anything.  I've had an amazing supportive husband who has lived out his Christ-like role of

"Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered." 1 Peter 3:7

Truly, Samuel has been so patient, loving, and understanding of me.  I could not ask for a more wonderful husband!  As we learn and grow together in marriage, I am always so struck by how perfectly we fit together, how good the Lord was in bringing us together.  Samuel is just the man I need and I know he will be just as understanding, loving, and patient after the baby arrives, as well as be a godly father to this little one.  There is such a confidence and peace knowing that my baby's daddy loves him just as much as I do.  I am thankful that the Lord has been so merciful to us, that we know His truth and that we desire to live lives pleasing to our Heavenly Father, for apart from His amazing grace, we would just be selfish sinners... and who knows where we might be.  We know that children are blessing, we know it is our responsibility to care for their physical and spiritual well-being, we know it will be hard work, but we know we cannot do it apart from God's grace.  How good the Lord is to reveal anything at all to us as a young couple. 

It is all for His glory, this pregnancy, this labor & birth, this child, and our family.